Friday, September 5, 2008

Wait

Have you ever felt useless? I know I have. I know others who have. Some feel useless because they don't believe they have marketable skills. Some feel useless because they didn't finish school. Some feel useless because they don't have what they thought they would have by this time. Some because they are too old. Some because they are too fat. Some because they aren't pretty enough. Some because they think themselves stupid. Some because they are pessimists. Some because they are sure the entire world is out to get them. Some because they feel like God has abandoned them...

But think about those times when you have felt useful. Everyone has them...even if they don't feel useful now. Sometimes you have to dig down deep to remember that feeling because it's been a long time. When you have helped someone solve a problem. When you have been that shoulder to cry on. When you've brought food or clothing to someone because they needed it. When you have sung your child to sleep after a bad dream. When you've made dinner for friends. When you've told someone you love them. Sometimes those moments are fleeting because we, as humans tend to focus on all the things that make us useless, rather than what makes us useful.

For those like me who believe that God loves us and sacrificed His son for us, how can we ever really believe that we are useless? What in the world would He have sacrificed Jesus for, if we had no usefulness? That's foolish...and God is not.

We have been told over and over that God has a purpose for each one of us...that He has planted a desire in our heart and a gift in our spirit and a talent in our hands and He wouldn't just mismatch these things. They will line up. He promised that. He said he would give us the desires of our heart. He planted it there, He will make it bloom. But He didn't say when.


The problem is waiting...God's human creations have no patience. The flowers do, the animals do...but we don't. And thus the human existance is one of worry and bitterness and self-loathing because WE can't make it happen for ourselves. We place the blame on ourselves for not figuring out what we are supposed to do RIGHT NOW. How arrogant of us. This is not about us...this is about God and His glory.

So, here am I...use me as You will, Lord. I struggle for patience, yes. But I wait on you, Lord. You have planted this flower...I will wait for you to make it bloom.

That's the prayer I hope we can all have. He PROMISED. And God will not betray His children. I know it. I embrace it. I wait.

2 comments:

Diana said...

Oh beautiful Rach. Those weren't the thoughts I expected from you. I know everyone goes through the feelings that you are dealing with. If someone says they haven't they are lying to themselves.
God is using you in incredible ways....and the best is yet to come and the hard thing is that it happens in God's time and not our own. Your are a precious flower in God's garden and beautiful friend remember, God is always working in you, and through you. I am excited to see what God continues to do with you.

Mandy said...

Just found your blog via myspace. I'll add ya to the blog roll!